Monday, 22 October 2012

Dreams and Desires: Book Review

Dreams and Desires by Louis Make published by Sapphire Press ISBN 978-0-7957-0432-1 in Cape Town.This is a South African romance book about Moyomhle an uptight woman who meets Zakhele who turns her life upside down by breaking all her defenses. Strong echoes of love are embedded in the book. It shows how love makes its way into people’s lives no matter the circumstances.
The characters Moyomhle and Zakhele have found themselves in the game of love. Moya represents a lot of women in this world. The type of woman, who has met men that have lied, cheated and misused her. These experiences have shaped who she is now, a no nonsense woman who does not take men at face value. Life does that to people, women in particular and one feels sorry for her but at the same time we can not blame her because she is trying to protect herself. The journey the book takes us on is one were we hope things turn out differently for her this time around. Will he prove her wrong or will he affirm her view of men.    
Moya is a headstrong and not willing to take risks without knowing what may come out of it character. This had a big impact on me because I believe that women should not be afraid to take control of their lives especially when it comes to avoiding situations that can lead to them getting hurt. The last thing one wants is to be taken advantage of and the last thing one wants to read about is reading about a fellow woman being mistreated. Moya’s actions are therefore encouraged.
Moya never believed that a man like Zakhele would be good for her or whether she would be good enough for him. Certain aspects of who he was made her believe that it would not work between them but it is these very aspects of Zakhele that brings their love story together. As I read the book I began to think maybe she was right but then as I delved deeper I realized that love has no conditions just like how life just happens love happens too.
 Zakhele the uber male character that has women falling at their knees for him is the stereotypical male character when it comes to being tall, dark and handsome and smooth talking. However the way he approaches love is different to most men, he has the right intentions, and he knows what he wants and goes for it, that is, he pursues Moya. What I liked most about him is that he acknowledged that love grew in his heart and that if Moya was not keen he would let her go because he loved her and hoped maybe one day love will grow within her too.
I have been in love and have lost it myself but this book made me feel like I had found love again. The story is about how one finds love and shuns it away because of the fear of the unknown and the lack of belief that someone can truly love you without any hidden intentions, without the pain and heartbreak that comes with the lies and deceitfulness that love comes with at times. This why “She couldn’t expose herself to him, couldn’t say those words out loud… She couldn’t admit that she’d fallen for the sweet words of yet another egotistical playboy”. This is often true for most women and Moya speaks directly at the reader as her emotions resonate with how most of us often feel.
The reason I loved this book and found it an enjoyable read was because the author was able to make me relate with the main characters as their situation is one often felt by many people around the world. I related to the leading female character because her response to love is often one that most women face because we are so used to men playing games that when love really arrives we are too blind to see it or believe in it or mainly we see it but look the other way because to feel the aching heartbreak that love brings is just too much to bare.
Dreams and Desires has interesting lead characters, one asks why Moya is so difficult but at the same time I sided with her. The mystery of the lead male character and were his intentions lie are page turners. Will Moya ever open her heart to love? This question ran through my mind as I kept turning the pages. One wonders were her heart will be at the end of it all. We get to know more about the characters and we fall in love in with them as we root for Moya to find love. Moya’s character does develop as the book goes on in terms of her beliefs and perceptions towards men.
The theme of this story is romance. It is a traditional love story and allows the reader to escape. We often face the same situations in life and therefore this book shows us how others deal with similar love or relationship situations. No matter who you are or what you have been through one thing we all have yearned for at some point in our lives is love and this book made me realise that love conquers all no matter how dark the situation.
This novel is for readers who believe in the complexities of love and understand that love does not always come easily. It is a book that will appeal to anyone who loves a good love story and the hopeless romantics. I have never heard of men who love romance novels but I am sure that this book is targeted at women of all ages because love finds women at all ages and this book brings romance and love to the readers.
The writing style is simple and informal, it allows for love and heartbreak undertones. I loved every aspect of this book because it was real and the emotions were real. It shows what love is about and that is the true essence of this book that love does happen no matter how hard your heart is when the right type of love comes along it will melt you because that love becomes yours no matter how hard you try to fight it. Moya’s words describe this perfectly “Moya’s inability to reject those flowers was evidence of the chink in the steel wall she had carefully rebuilt around her heart”
Lessons are learnt by Moya as she discovers the joys and pains of love. Her opinions change towards the end of the book and this allows the reader to realise that one only realizes what they had when it’s gone and if you do not fight for it you will never know what will have come out from it. Moya’s dreams become her desires in reality because she learns to embrace what love is really about no matter the outcome.
The imperfectness of love is portrayed in this book. One realizes that love comes when you least expect it and from the person you least expect to get it from. It is not like careers which are often planned. True love grows and comes from within and no matter how strong or independent a woman is if that feeling engulfs you it is one that can not be easily shaken off. As Moya falls in love with Zakhele the emotions she feels are felt by the reader too. Her love for Zakhele leaves an imprint in our hearts and gives hope to those who have lost love or had their hearts toiled with that their day to fully embrace love again will come too.
The author Louise Make is thirty, Xhosa and Capetonian by birth. She comes from a family of strong women. Her family background may be the reason why her books have strong, independent female lead characters such as Moya in the book Dreams and Desires.
Her other work includes Five-star Seduction and this further emphasizes how most of her leading ladies are career women who are not ready for love and attraction. They are independent and do not want to be men’s playthings. However she leans past the male stereotypes in that these men are more serious about love and relationships than most.
This book made me believe that as much as love sometimes only seems to be real in books and dreams it is possible to have it in real life too. A love that truly exists for two and no more is shown perfectly in this book. The belief I had in Moya in the beginning of the book is one that stays on after closing the book.
“You’re taking me on the best adventure of my life. The thought of building a home with you excites me more than anything else. I want a family with you, my lovely – and I want us to grow together. I’m done chasing thrills. I have everything I need right here with you”. Now tell me that this statement is something you can’t believe in because I know I sure can.

Monday, 15 October 2012

Birthday Speech

This is a little something I wrote for my family as a speech on my birthday.......
21 September 1991 was the day I came into this world and today is the 21st of September 2012. It has been a long journey and I am sure that there is a lot in store for me in the many more years to come. Being brought into this world and looking at the world with innocent eyes during my childhood is one of the moments I wish I could go back to but now am all grown up now and I see the world in different eyes. I realise now why mum would always say don’t be in a rush to grow up. Mum I love you and I always will. I thank you for being my rock and trying to protect me from the things I still struggle to understand. Sometimes I feel I robbed your from enjoying being young when you had me but I know now that it is a blessing because we’ve grown together, I apologize for giving you a hard time at times and I apologize for the hard times we will face later on but I want you to know all I ever strive for is to make you happy and proud. You the coolest mum I know and now that I am growing up I see qualities in me that are so much like yours and I know that my mother is a fighter and if I can have one quality of yours that’s one thing I am proud of. I am proud to have a mum like you who raised me, pulled my ears and combed my hair. I love you mum and I appreciate all the things you have done for me. Together we are not just mother and daughter now I can say we are superwomen and I thank you for birthing life and igniting the light within me that you call Chiedza. I want to thank the rest of my family for always believing in me even when I never believed in myself. I understand it’s not easy to have a daughter, granddaughter, niece or cousin who is as outspoken, blunt and a little bit crazy like me. I know sometimes you never understand the decisions I make but I know it has never stopped you from loving me. I am grateful. To my Gogo, my source, my strength and my friend I’d like to thank you for showing me what strong, independent women are like. And for always giving me more pocket money even though u knew I had because u believed girls shouldn’t go around without money otherwise they will start looking for trouble, the girl talks we had and the never ending African movies we could never change the channel even when you knew you were falling asleep on the couch, thank God for PVR now. Sometimes I’d keep quiet when you asked who’s in the kitchen even when I was there because I knew you would ask for some ice blocks but am glad you are my Gogo because that’s what makes you special. To Aunty Tendi thank you for making me realise its okay to say good riddance to guys who don’t deserve me and yes for changing my poopoo diaper something you never let me forget, To my dad even though I don’t see you everyday and your not so much a part of my life as much as I want you to be, you taught me one thing that no man will ever love me as much as my daddy. To Mu thanks for always having my back and protecting my honour when guys try to diss me, To uncle tucx where do I start with u firstly id like to apologize for painting your toes and putting Sibongile Aza’s black baby in your blankets. But I want to thank you because you have been the weirdly absurdly father figure in my life. When I am down you always know there’s Chicken Licken, when we are bored u always know we can call friends and have a braai or better yet call Chichi when you’ve got a horror movie to watch and you pretend you not scared but u just want to watch it with. You taught me not to take life too seriously live everyday like it’s your last but always keep a level head. Uncle Jim well I don’t see you much but you’ve bailed me out on numerous occasions and I am forever grateful. You have taught me the importance of having your family’s back even if you don’t see them everyday, To my crazy little sister Aza u taught me what it means to a big sister even though I longed for a big sister myself when I was growing up. I love u always from your quirky videos, your dance moves and the fact that you followed after me outspoken and u r yourself. Let no one ever tell you you’re not good enough because u go beyond that seeing your smile brightens my day no matter how angry I am. Your hugs and your baby voice make you who you are. You are my little star and I know in my heart that when you grow up you will be an even bigger and brighter star, To Michael my brother from another mother, today is our birthday and I am so happy to share my special day with. You taught me the value of hommies over whores excuse my language, u taught me that no matter what people say I am the best damn thing and anyone would be a fool not to cherish me. You taught me the value of me and that even when we sitting on the corner stoop we don’t have to limit ourselves to that stoop we can be anything we want to be and even when we fail and people laugh we can keep trying. Nothing can take that away from us the fighter’s spirit, the legends 305 till we die. I l.ove u. To Pulu I miss u and I wish u were here with us celebrating. You always believed in me and always gave me the best advice in short never marry a zezuru Muzukuru, work hard and be strong. Plus dance even if you are not a great dancer. I love u Pulu and hope u looking down on us smiling. I hope I make u proud. Finally Melody my best friend, I don’t know where u came from and how it happened, I treated u badly at first and I’m sorry but I’m glad we looked passed that and u arrived in my life like a shooting star u are one of a kind. U always used to knock on my window to go to church on Sundays and I always used to be like cant she leave me alone why does she bother. You saved my life when I was really down, when I needed someone to show me the way. I love you for that and even though we are polar opposites u get me and I can’t imagine my life without you. So I thank you for being my best friend and I hope things will never change. Thank you all for being here with me today.
I would like to toast to celebrating life.

Monday, 8 October 2012

“ Child Welfare is for the children and their families and not against them”

      I have been working with Child Welfare a non-governmental organization based in Halfway House Midrand. Child Welfare’s registration number is 001-330 NPO. The organization serves the Midrand area, Rabie Ridge, Ivory Park Ext. 2, Mzabalazo and Thembakoza. Child Welfare aims to protect, uplift and promote the well-being of children and their families through the provision of essential social services, community development and livelihood projects in Midrand and surrounding areas. Their cause is very close to my heart as all of us know the joy of children whether they are our children or siblings or friends .

     Services are rendered to children from birth to the age of 18 years. Child Welfare aims to uplift the standard of living for children and their families affected by poverty and HIV/AIDS. Livelihood development projects address the issue of unemployment through skills development, job creation and entrepreneurial training for parents and caregivers in the Ivory Park community They are doing more hope you can join me and please support Child Welfare by checking out their Facebook page ; Child Welfare SA:Midrand/ Twitter page @childwelfareMID and doing anything you can to help

Wednesday, 3 October 2012

The forbidden fruit

So Ive decided to (journalize) not an actual word, about the power of sex with someone you love. In other words this is making love. So the moment when you just have to write about great sex you know for sure it was great sex. When you have a great connection with someone and you decide to indulge in pleasures for the both of you nothing can beat that, even a booze filled one night stand cannot compete. When you really love someone and you choose to share the most intimate parts of you it becomes more than just indulging in the forbidden fruit but something that can change everything you have. The way you see that person is with more love and more adoration because you have opened yourself up to someone and they have seen and felt your vulnerabilities. When loving happens like that it cant just be frorbidden but beautiful. Moments like these dont just happen in fairy tales they happen when you choose to put your heart and body in one place. It's even better when bothg of you make that choice together.